Once upon a time in a Galaxy Far Far Away.........

Today.....we tell a story of despair... A Story of a young midget who had become so twisted by the dark side of the Talls that he now exists only a bitter Gnome with no hopes of a future on our fine lands of Darkspear.  We tell the story of a Gnome who once went by the name of Jedi-Master Valmore.

In order to truly understand what happened to this young gnome we must start from the beginning.  It was almost 45 Levels ago when Valmore was brought to the Council of Midgets by our Warlock Pooky who back before "The Tall Wars" went by Obi Wan Na Wack Off To Anime.

Pooky:  Attention Council of Midgets I would like to take Valmore as my Midget Apprentice.  The hatred of talls is strong with him I can FEEL it.

Azriol:  Pooky there are several problems with this proposition.  First you yourself are still my Padawan Apprentice and have many sexual favors to finish.  And Secondly I just turned on my "Carebear Detection Hack" and Valmore is appearing on the mini-map. 

Pooky:  BUT SIR... I demand that he be trained in the ways of Midgetism.  I believe he is the chosen one.

Mace Windu:  You believe he is the one to bring balance to the Shorts?

Tinka/Biter:  How the hell did Samuel L. Jackson get on our fukkin comms?

Mace Windu's IP has been Banned from Ventrillo.

Azriol:  Healem?  I will leave this decision to you.

Pooky:  And I will never talk about Anime again if I can train him.

Healem:  Hmmmmm.... Very dangerous this Gnomes training is.  I sense compassion in him.  Compassion leads to noobie instance runs... Noobie instance runs leads to instance loving.. Instance loving leads to Blubieness.  Bluebieness leads to the Dark Side of the Talls.  Midget he is Pooky but Merciless he is not.

Wazu:  I second the opinion of Healem...  This council must behave as it did in Everquest.  I miss Everquest..   Remember when we pwned people in L.Fay?

Healem:  Wait... Did you say you won't talk about Anime?  Nevermind then train whoever you want.

And so it began... Valmore was to be trained in the ways of the Force.  He was to become a Merciless Midget.

He entered the Merciless Midget Training which is long and fierce.  The toughest training known to Darkspear!

The Training began with Valmore learning to destroy those beings in the world that are less powerful then himself! 

Only by showing NO MERCY to those defenseless critters of the world would Valmore learn to Find The Force.  However,  even at the beginning of his training Valmore was already proving that a life of midgetism would be too difficult.

Later he was told to dance in Fires to bring out the anger and hate in the talls!

And to proclaim to ALL talls of the zone that they are FILTHY!

Somewhere along the way in his training ironically Valmore found "Theforce"

And so it was that Valmore grew up to a strong level 60 Jedi Knight of the Merciless Midgets.  Thanks to his wonderful training from Pooky he had become a powerful force in destroying the talls!  But was this the real Valmore?  Was he really a Merciless Midget  meant to destroy all talls and strike fear in the hearts of Darkspear?  Or was he really a bluebie noobie underneath it all? 

As many days passed Valmore began to become friends with the known Child Molester of Darkspear "Michael Chipman Jackson".  They were becoming closer and closer to eachother in both an emotionally and sexual way each day and Valmore began learning the ways of the Dark Side of the Talls and Force.  Chipman asked young Valmore to be his personal representative on the Merciless Midget Council.

He told him bullshit stories.

And began instilling doubt in Valmores Midget ways.

They talked for hours.

Until Valmore discovered Chipman's identity as Michael Jackson a Filthy Tall was TRUE!

But Chipman laid doubt in his mind still.

Valmore immediately ran to Master Windu to explain to him everything he learned!

And was earning respect with the Council

However,  he was told to wait as Master Windu went to put an end to Chipman touching the privates of our armies privates.  Could Valmore really stand by and let the supposed only person to take him to MC perish?

He rushed to the tower where they were fighting and arrived JUST in time!

But Chipman was still manipulating his mind!  Pulling him away from his teachings of Master Pooky.

So Valmore Force Pushed Windu off the ramp to save the Sith Lord Chipman.

And the only black human of Darkspear perished :(.

With no more options Valmore became known from that day forward as Darth Blubie Carebear.  And Jedi-Master Valmore was dead forever.

But when he encountered his mentor and longtime friend Pooky in the halls of Ironforge he told him everything!

And they realized what must be done... I battle must be waged!

After much slapping Darth Bluebie Carebear was thrown into the lava where he almost destroyed.

But Chipman rescued him and outfitted him in phat lewt for him to live on.  Too bad Valmore was too much of a newb to realize Dreadmist isn't for rogues.

Eventually Darth Bluebie Carebear became so powerful that he was even more a freak than Chipman himself.  This evidence was recovered using Azriol's Hacks.